Some people like to think the “Thrilla in Manilla” was the greatest fight of the three bout series between Muhammad Ali and Joe Frazier. While that was a good one, the first fight was coined the “Fight of the Century” for a reason. That fight is a fitting analogy to one of the best fantasy hockey playoff matchups I have seen in a while, mainly because in both the playoff match and the fight, a gorilla prevailed (not because he was black, because that was Ali’s nickname for Frazier, you racist).
It all came down to the last day in this “epic” match (side note: I use epic in quotation marks because the Bubonic Plague was epic, the Crusades were Epic. Your fantasy hockey matchup, or your workout, are not), right down to the last two minutes of the last two games. A game winning goal for the Halifax Highlanders, a very real possibility in both games, and they win. You could almost hear Burt Lancaster scream “The tension, and the excitement here, is monumental!” In fact, lets just watch that to get everyone pumped up.
In the end, Captain Serious sealed the deal for Anzoolander. When Jesse Cook was told that Toews just had a game winning goal to save his team, Cook responded, “he didn’t save my team, he just iced the match. So serious.”
For all the other matchups, the losers were either outmanaged, outmatched, outplayed, or all three. Pick one. There were some windows closing on some good teams this season if they couldn’t pull off an Anze Cup, and those windows slammed shut.
With that, lets look at this week’s playoff matchups.
1. Bizarrohawks vs. 7. Everett Silvertips (regular season winner – 20-9 for Bizarrohawks)
Everett Silvertips came back to life after a few quiet weeks, leading the entire league in points for the 5th time in the last 7 weeks, easily dominating his opponent. Still, the weakness here is in net, especially that terrible, god awful goalie for the Canucks, and that will be an uncertainty for however long this team lasts (which won’t be long). Bizarrohawks on the other hand, put up an awful performance, barely eeking out a win against a team that had its two best players on IR. So bad is this team playing in fact, that only 2 of the starting offense this made it into the top 300 over the last seven days.
But isn’t that how it works? Great teams find a way to win even when not playing their best, and this team continues to do so. This may be a bit closer of a matchup, and Everett Silvertips enters the week as healthy as they have ever been, but I still like Bizarrohawks to advance. This match is going to come down to goaltending and ancillary stats, like short handed goals.
Prediction: Bizarrohawks sneaks by 6-5-5, and makes its first appearance in the Anze Cup Finals.
3. Anzoolander versus 5. Jesse Loves Paymon (regular season winner – 20-7 for Anzoolander)
Here was have the hottest team from last week versus the team with the most uninspiring victory. I applaud JLP GM Steve McIntyre for going for it at the trade deadline, but he really didn’t get that much out of his trades, and his team looked awful. Maybe it is just his shiny head that looks awful, I don’t know.
But the best part of this matchup isn’t the teams, it is the long tenured relationship of the GMs themselves. Brothers from another mother, born 20 days apart, been through thick and thin. One hooked up with the other’s sister, and one drew all over the other’s face (not really a fair trade, but I laughed at both).
I am looking forward to good banter on the Smack Talk feature on the league page (quietly the most underrated new feature), and can see Anzoolander GM Jesse Cook hunched over his computer like a gorilla slamming the desk when things go wrong, with Steve McIntyre watching StatTracker 10 miles away with a beverage in hand with the same incredulous “Are you kidding me?!?!?” as when he would get runner runner eliminated from a sit-and-go. This game will come down to one player; Carey Price. He could literally stand beside the net and allow all shots in for the rest of the season and still win the Vezina. What a season he has had. Bert, you are an idiot. There is no other way to put it.
Prediction: Anzoolander makes its second Anze Cup Finals appearance in a row, winning 8-4-4.
Good luck to all teams still in it, and God speed.
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