Power Rankings: Week 2

Through two weeks, I think one thing is pretty clear:  Pistol needs help.

1.  Me So Vyborny (previous: 1) – Put up a monster week in points and the goalies are starting to come around.  This team is well rounded and if it can stay healthy, will be the team to beat all year.

2.  Captain Chinese (3) – This team will live and die with Carey Price’s head, which is rumored to be worse than Ottawa HC GM Court Watson’s head on the golf course.  For now though this team looks sharp.  Is there anything the Chinese aren’t taking over?

3.  Bizzarohawks (7) – Monster week on offense with some pretty stout goaltending.  Needs some more production from Ilya Kovalchuk and Jeff Carter before I put this team at the top.  I refuse to believe Guillaume Latendresse and Joe Pavelski can lead a team to victory.  In anything.

4.  Super Sperm (5) – Solid win this week, though it was against one of the weaker teams in the league.  Gonna need a bit more production from someone other than his defense to stay in the top half of these power rankings, but I would suspect that will happen sooner than later.

5.  Malkin in the Middle (4) – This team is missing a bit of offensive spunk to be an elite team; maybe Jesse can wipe some of Paymon’s off his face and offer it to Dave.  I imagine Dave would politely say no, thank you.

6.  Jesse Loves Paymon (2) – I had this team originally at 4, but then I looked at the goalies….one is coming off a unreal year but the Cinderella story for his team may be over, the other is a backup on fire who will eventually just be the backup.  The new addition is old balls.  This team needs something else.

7.  Sultan HC (6) - Not a great performance, but good enough to beat a subpar team.  Had it not been for a big night on the Jersey shore Saturday night, probably would have walked away with a loss.  This team is to dependent on too few NHL teams for my liking, I can’t see this team being consistent enough to make a title run.

8.  Texans (12) – What the hell was I thinking last week?  Pavel Datsyuk, Eric Staal and Zach Parise all on one team?  How the hell did that happen?  Oh wait, then I looked at the goalies.  Yup, makes sense now.

9.  This Space 4 rent $5 (11) – The Sergei Bobby era has begun for this franchise!  I can’t wait to see what happens.  I like this team and Team Canada’s future very much, cause of this guy.

10.  Not Poodle!!! (13) – Here because this team beat Pistol’s Hellcats, which I think as the season progresses, will not be saying much.

11.  Ottawa HC (10) – Injuries are plaguing this team, as are healthy scratches and benchings, and when the second round draft pick contributes one assist, the team is usually in trouble.  And their GM is a shitty drafter with a man crush on Duncan Keith.  This guy is another reason I like Team Canada’s future, though I don’t really like this team’s future.

12.  Camel Toews (8) – Was outscored by the other team’s three best players.  Not a good week for this team.  Pick up watch:  Clarke MacArthur was dropped by GM Jesse Cook and scored a pretty goal last night.  Keep an eye on him as Cook historically has done a horrible job of assessing talent.

13.  Kanucks (14) – Ugly, ugly, ugly, ugly, ugly (repeat a Googol times)

14.  Pistol’s Hellcats (9) – You lose 13-0, you deserve to be here.

Quote of the week

“If I had $5 I'd change my team name to Jesse Loves Free Agents” – Jesse Loves Paymon GM Steve McIntyre

Rejected Trade of the week

Offered:  Nathan Horton and Devin Setoguchi

Asking:  Steven Stamkos

Alrighty then.