Power Rankings: Week 9

Last one for a while as next week I head to Hawai’i for some overpriced average food and sunshine.

1.  Jesse Loves Paymon (Previous: 1) – Despite a poor showing by this top ranked offense, this team still managed a win.  This was most likely a result of playing one of the worst teams in the league, knowing it was going to be a cake walk and getting wasted every night of the week.

2.  Captain Chinese (2) – Another strong week.  The Vietnamese has this team going strong.

3.  Super Sperm (3) – Keeper Phil Kessel needed everything to go right the last day of the week, and boy, did it.  Super Sperm GM Ryan Schauble thinks he should have a say in trades. LOL ROFL GFY.  Read the League Charter.

4.  Pistol’s Hellcats (7) – Average goaltending will keep this team from getting any better and being a legitimate contender.  Stevie Franchise needs to find his mojo again.  If he does, well done Pistol.  If he doesn’t, you suck Pistol.

5.  Anzoolander (8) – Strong week offensively.  GM Jesse Cook has built a pretty good team, just missing a few pieces.  Will he leverage next year to get Quick and make a run at the title?

6  Malkin in the Middle (5) – Made a move to improve in goal and had worse luck than Big Ben in a Florida nightclub.  Needs healthy goalies to survive the gauntlet over the next couple of weeks.

7.  This Space for Rent $5 (10) – 5 seconds away from a shutout, Luongo carried the defense for this team.

8.  Not Poodle!!! (6) – One Move Matt made one move this week, like clockwork, on Sunday evening.

9.  Sultan HC (4) – Could have won this weak, but the Capitals got shut out, and herein lies the weakness to this team.

10.  Me So Vyborny (11) – Barely beat the worst team in the league, but a win is still a win.  Brodeur is back, Hossa is back soon, and Crawford will be sitting on the bench doing nothing for this team.

11.  Texans (9) – Injuries continue to plague this team…y’all come back real soon to the roster, y’all hear?

12.  Kanucks (12) – I am betting that when GM Dave Kitchen went to Vegas this weekend he did not place a bet in the sportsbook for this team to win the Anze Cup this year.

13.  Bizzarohawks (13) – How did this team’s week go?  This sums it up pretty much.

18.  Everett Silvertips (17) – Clearly this team is in rebuild mode, which is sad considering the season is only 2 months in.  I think the look on Rick DiPietro’s face Saturday night sums up how GM Court Watson feels.

Quote of the week come from Steve McIntyre at a two thirds Commissioner weekend:

“I felt bad for Jesse on Tuuka Rask (begin silent hysterical laugh now).”

Rejected trade of the week:

Offered:

Niclas Bergfors and a 4th round

Asking:

Corey Crawford and a 2nd round

Jesse will pay more.